How I’m Spending Your Summer Vacation

Anyone doing anything, or are y’all doing nothing?

As for myself, at the moment I’m continuing to hinder Mr. Miller with his yogic yoga book, and I think we’ve almost reached nowhere. Odds are at least fifty-fifty, in my estimation, that someday, despite my best efforts, it will be found in side-tables worldwide, along whatever Bibles, Qur’ans, Dhammapadas, etc., favored by whichever hotel or motel chains. You think I’m kidding…

Otherwise, you’d have no way of knowing, but might have guessed, that I spend my days mining tunnels through the accumulated mainly paper condensified crap-vomit of two or three decades of not just my own life, but the lives of several other sloppy pack-rats – a couple of them accomplished gurus of the yogic anti-yoga of accumulation of things. Some of it is what I’ve mainly been living offa sellin the last five or so years, but I need to get trashing and recycling and maybe bulk-selling to make space…

…for my main project, the one I’ve been tellin youse about for a good long time now. One of the things that’s been holding me back on sharing more of it with you – alongside superstition about talking too much about stuff, and also some related and I believe entirely valid concern about overexposing, overdoing, prematurely squandering – is that I might have to do something I expect to be painful and shocking for you: Exposure of the scarred and hulking aged Golem of me in photographic form.

44 comments on “How I’m Spending Your Summer Vacation

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  1. hopefully volunteering a week to work at camp for kids with multiple sclerosis.

    you’re so skilled at using words descriptively that pix may be superflux.

  2. @ CK MacLeod:

    Last couple of years,mrs. fuster been medical director of the camp and I’ve had to stay home and dog-sit. last year the niece also went.
    this year, the nephew will be in the house and I get to go… assuming the mrs’ health permits any of us to go.

  3. I sympathize in respect to the photo thing. CK’s seen it already, but here’s the link to my old yoga book so you can see what I did with my own image and then click on the excerpt for what I wrote about the photo taken of me for yoga advertisement.
    Ugh. Seriously painful, but funny at this point.

  4. One of the things I really appreciate about the Red Hot Chili Peppers is that they always subverted shit like photos. In almost every photo they make a stupid face. Doing it sometimes like the Beatles did was cute or childish, doing it all the time for 30 years is a statement and they even spoke about it as a rebellion against having to take serious photos.

  5. @ fuster:
    best thoughts on the health of the missus!

    @ Scott Miller:
    It’s kind of an anticipatory beard-by-aura.

    Laughed out loud about the puddle of pee under the “dorky photo.” However, as a yoga dude, you forget how impressed normal people may be by the feat it displays. Few regular shlubs would call that photo dorky. Even if a big pile of shit was sitting there next to the pee… still wouldn’t call it dorky… exactly.

  6. Scott, you still selling the book?

    @Tsar…. why not include it in the “by a contender” list? there’s probably enough room to squeeze it in.

  7. You can download it for free from the website. When CK an I get going with mailing the new book, it’ll probably be easy for us to mail the old one too, so at some point, if you’re interested we can send you a hard copy. Free for blog brothers.

  8. it’s been 25 years since the end of the career of yoga-trained Mets pitcher Sidd Finch. Best fastball ever.

  9. @ fuster:
    If it weren’t for the internet…well…if it weren’t for the internet this blog wouldn’t exist in the first place…but anyway…you could have strung me along with the Sidd Finch thing because I never heard of him. Thanks to internet access, I schooled myself about the Plimpton gag. George Plimpton was really amazing guy. Funny that he shortened Siddhartha to Sidd.

  10. @ fuster:
    Yes, a very good gag. Someone should make a movie based on Plimpton’s life. They made one about the Paper Lion, but one about his whole life would be cool.

  11. @ miguel cervantes:
    The old book is a collage of yoga insights and stories–some of them yogic science fiction. Because CK is superstitious he probably would prefer I not get into what the new book is. But here goes:
    It’s meant to help people know what yoga is today. It’s not a “how to do yoga” book; it’s a “now we can know what yoga is” book.

  12. My superstitions and beliefs mainly have to do with not disturbing the muse, disrupting the project during conceptualization and primary execution phases. At this point, I think you’re mainly safe talking about it exactly as much as you feel like talking about it with the aim of advancing along the creative spiral from achieved work to its propagation and eventual feedback to new work in whatever form, but to give away spoilers – whatever they are for a work like this one – might be unfair to the same people whose help in completing the process you need. You will likely sense inwardly whenever you’re going too far. The old Scott might have ignored the voice or barged ahead anyway, laughing all the way. I’m not sure about you in your present incarnation, but you seem much older and wiser, as well you ought to be.

  13. @ CK MacLeod:
    Since the Universe went to so much trouble to give me no other options, it would be sad if I still somehow managed not to gain any wisdom. I liked your spoiler point.

  14. I think this proves Hegel’s point about ideas driving history. You’ll notice how many times since I created my avatar that the idea of me as an excreting being has driven topics of discussion.

  15. @ fuster:

    But wait there’s more.

    A recent study of college students at the State University of New York in Albany suggests that semen acts as an antidepressant. Females in the study who were having sex without condoms (see safe sex caution, above) had fewer signs of depression than women who used condoms or abstained from sex.

    “These data are consistent with the possibility that semen may antagonize depressive symptoms,” the authors wrote, “and evidence which shows that the vagina absorbs a number of components of semen that can be detected in the bloodstream within a few hours of administration.”

    I kid you not, ladies. Semen is good stuff. It gives a shot of zinc, calcium, potassium, fructose, proteins — a veritable cornucopia of vitality!

  16. @ bob:

    just as cow’s milk is calibrated for calves, I would bet a buck that horse semen best serves in fulfillyment of the equine constitution.

  17. That semen info does support what tantrics have always said about the stuff. If a man “holds his seed,” then, does it help with his depression? Or does it not work like that?

  18. Cannot spermatazoa and possibly seminal fluid be considered forms of “flesh”? How do these questions fit within a vegetarian discipline? What about those placenta-gourmet hippies? Can the various practices under consideration be construed as violating the spirit of the Noachide commandment never to eat the limb of a living creature? Are they forms of cannibalism?

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